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lyrics

My old Uncle Pat, he wasn’t Irish
But he spoke with an accent anyway
He said he got it in the boxing rings of Dublin
But in Ireland he never spent a day

Every Christmas he would fill himself with eggnog
And gather all the children to his side
And he’d tell us how he lost his leg in battle
And how an Irish soldier never lied

(chorus)
Uncle Pat, Uncle Pat tell a story
About the grand adventures you have had
There be one-legged dances for the lassies
And one more round of eggnog for the lads

He told us how he lost his leg in battle
When his ship was blown to bits at sea
There were many bodies floating in the water
And the only fellow that survived was he

He floated on some driftwood to an island
And nearly died on that forsaken shore
But dissenting voices calling from the kitchen
Say, “Your Uncle Pat was never in the war!”

(chorus)

On the day he was finally rescued
A flying saucer carried him away
And they told him of their plans for domination
And how the human race was going to pay

But Pat took a stand against them aliens
With a one-legged dropkick to the face
And he sent them whimpering back to their home planet
And consequently saved the human race

(chorus)

credits

from The Complicated Saga of Eggnog and Yule Log, track released November 22, 2011
words and music by Ray Hedgpeth
performed by The Amoeba People
Background vocals: Eli and Zoe

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The Amoeba People Lakewood, California

The Amoeba People are musical ambassadors from the Planet Crouton, here to learn about our world, to unravel the wonders of its natural history, to study the life which inhabits it and to parse the mysteries of the human species by learning its dance moves. The band consists of Mr. Hedgpeth (captain), Mr. Jordan (navigator), and Mr. Mosley (engineer and technician). ... more

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