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A Brief Chronological History of the Space Monkey Program

from Songs, Stories, and Other Non Sequiturs by The Amoeba People

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lyrics

A BRIEF CHRONOLOGICAL HISTORY
OF THE SPACE MONKEY PROGRAM


KID 1: Hey! Look this record I found. It’s called “A Brief, Chronological History of the Space Monkey Program.”

KID 2: Let’s listen too it!

KID 3: Yeah, put it on.

KID 1: All right, let me put it on the record player. Put the needle on.


SOUND: CRACKLING

MUSIC: SPACE MONKEY SONG


BIG LOUIE LEBEQ:
In Nineteen hundred and forty-eight
They sent a monkey up into space
The monkey’s name was Albert
No human could take his place
He was a brave little monkey
But his time had come

KID 1: Sounds like the monkey might’ve died.

MUSIC STOPS

BLL: Kids, I’m trying to sing a happy little song here about the Space Monkey program.

KID 2: I think this record’s talking to us.

KID 3: What should we do?

KID 2: Say something back!

KID 1: When you said his time had come it sounded like the monkey might’ve . . . died.

BLL: Well, yes, kids, as a matter of fact he did.

KIDS: (collective groan)

MUSIC STARTS AGAIN

BLL: Next came Albert the second
Month of July Year of ‘49
He went higher and farther than
Albert the first
Boy he was surely flyin’
What a brave little monkey
But his time had come

KID 1: Did he die too?

MUSIC STOPS

BLL: Now look here, kids. I don’t want to be the bearer of bad news, but as a matter of fact, Albert the second died as well.

KIDS: (Collective groan)

BLL: And I should clarify that Albert the second was technically the first monkey in space since he reached an altitude of 134 kilometers, while Albert the first only made it to 63, and as I’m sure you all know space begins at about a hundred kilometers.

MUSIC STARTS AGAIN

BLL: Later that same year
Long come Albert the third and
Albert the fourth
September flew one December the other
And boy how they stayed the course
They were brave little monkeys
But their time had come

KID 1: So the same thing happened to them too, huh?

MUSIC STOPS

BLL: Sadly, Albert the third died when his rocket exploded at a mere 10 km high.

KIDS: (Collective groan)

BLL: And as for Albert the fourth, that poor little guy died on impact when he returned to Earth.

KIDS: (Collective groan)

BLL: And while we’re at it I might as well tell you that in 1951 Albert the fifth died as well; the cause was two simple words: parachute failure.

MUSIC STARTS AGAIN


BLL: Then ’long came a monkey named Yorrick
In September 1951
He flew into space with 11 little mice
Then his work for mankind was done
He was a brave little monkey
But his time had come

MUSIC STOPS

KID 2: Yorrick too? That’s terrible!

BLL: Actually, you’ll be pleased to know that Yorrik, a.k.a. Albert the sixth, who went up with the aforementioned 11 mice, was the first monkey to survive a space flight.

KIDS: (Collective cheer)

BLL: Hold on now, don’t get too cheery. Yorick sadly died two hours after landing.

KIDS: (Collective groan)

KID 3: Alas, poor Yorrick!

BLL: So let’s sing in honor of those monkeys who lost their lives, who paved the way for human astronauts, who went where no primate had gone before!

All: Get along little monkey
Get along little monkey
Little monkey oh
Little monkey oh
Little monkey
(yodel)

credits

from Songs, Stories, and Other Non Sequiturs, released July 7, 2010
words and music by Ray Hedgpeth
featuring Brian Ure (lead vocals)

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The Amoeba People Lakewood, California

The Amoeba People are musical ambassadors from the Planet Crouton, here to learn about our world, to unravel the wonders of its natural history, to study the life which inhabits it and to parse the mysteries of the human species by learning its dance moves. The band consists of Mr. Hedgpeth (captain), Mr. Jordan (navigator), and Mr. Mosley (engineer and technician). ... more

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